17 February 2012

Don't get into a car with a drunk driver.

Especially if that drunk driver is a young male with something to prove. I think all that was proved was his stupidity as well as my own.

See the picture on the left, that's my right leg the morning after I almost died. The left leg pretty much matches the right leg and I had chafing from the seat belt on my neck and a headache from my head whacking the passenger window.

My friend, who likes to drive like a maniac even when he isn't drinking decided it was time to go home. I was tired and I wanted to go home too, so I asked him if he was okay to drive. Of course his answer was going to be yes because he didn't want to sleep in his uncomfortable truck 15 miles from home, he could have asked his friend if we could spend the night is what he should have done. I really should have asked to stay the night but I had no way of getting home the next day so I figured I would take my chances. He didn't seem to be that drunk, in reality he probably wasn't. But he decided to be a real genius and instead of driving us home he drove on a two-lane rural road in the opposite direction.

He decided it would be a really good idea to speed up really fast and then wiggle the steering wheel to give us a little toss around down the road. I was silent because I didn't want to tell him to stop and then, being the macho ass hole he was, decide to do even worse. Well guess what happened? The damn guy lost control, yup he lost control of the truck. I just sat back and accepted fate, I fucked up. I have read that people that don't tighten up in an accident don't get hurt as bad. Well shit, I was just relaxed and calm and realized right that second I did it to myself. Take your medicine fool! In less than the blink of an eye the truck was skidding down the road towards telephone (or power poles I don't know the difference) I though for sure we were going to end up like this white truck.

Actually it wouldn't have been exactly like that, he probably would have ended up head on into a pole and it was all about speed and how far we were skidding to determine if I was gonna get the fucked end of the pole or he was. Check out the picture below. We were heading towards the hills, at night on a road that has dirt on it ALL THE TIME! He lost control and swerved a whole lot in an attempt to regain control of the truck. Some how the truck went between the two poles on the left side pointed in the opposite direction than we were headed. See the red arrow, we managed to squeeze through that. It was some crazy Dukes of Hazzard shit!!!!
Well isn't that just lovely! I was banged around pretty good and his truck was in the ditch. Well I guess it's time to climb out of the truck on the driver side and walk back to Sisquoc, the little patch of houses off in the distance. He got his buddy to check out the situation to see if he could fish him out, well whaddya know that damn yahoo doesn't even have fuel in his truck!!! I was tired, hurting and in the mood to just fall asleep in a dirt field by that point (I think my adrenaline rush was long gone and I was zonked). So my friend is pissed (he should be at how stupid he was) and frantically trying to figure out who to come save him before the authorities see a truck in the ditch and start investigating.

I told him to call his step-brother, as much as he didn't want to, he had no other options. It was get his ass chewed or end up in jail and possibly deported back to New Zealand. It's not like it would have been his first run in with the law. He settled on calling his brother and he was able to tow him out in a stealthy manner, we were out of the ditch for 2 minutes and driving down the road when we saw the CHP doing their rounds out there.

Now what did we learn here today boys and girls?
  1. Don't get into a car with someone who is driving drunk, no matter how bad you wanna go home.
  2. Guys that act like they have something to prove usually prove they are stupid.
  3. I almost died.
  4. Being in a fender bender hurts much worse two days after you get tossed around like a Barbie in a car.
  5. A day above ground is always better than the alternative.
  6. I am fucking stupid for having to live through the above because I knew better. I KNEW better and I went against my better judgement.

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